Reactions

I've gotten so many varied responses when I tell people I've quit my job. Many respond that it is the right thing to do, that I should stay home with my progeny. Others look at me incredulously. What many people don't understand is that I decided to quit for many reasons. I'm not making a value statement that I believe that mothers should stay home with their children. I am not even sure that this is better for the Munch, for the reasons mentioned below.

No matter, when I tell someone that I quit my job they will have an opinion. Very strange. If I didn't have a baby, I venture that nobody would have an opinion. People might ask more questions about why, what my plans were, etc. But as it is, the answer is assumed, along with all of the implied family values attributions. I want to state for the record that I would still be working today if I felt more passionately about my job, or if I felt that it was leading somewhere I wanted to go. The way I see it, I have the opportunity to quit my job, spend more time with my son (which I love, by the way), and reevaluate my career goals. I still have a lot of guilt issues and feel that my decision was primarily a selfish one. Being with the Munch feels very self-indulgent. I am very lucky to be in a position to make this choice.

As I mentioned, I am not convinced that my choice is in the Munch's best interest. Sometime I can be a pretty rotten mother - I will let him cry while I shower, for example. I'm not proficient in nursery rhymes and songs. I take him out and get him over tired. Sometimes I can be a decent mother. I shower him with affection, read him books, and make him smile and laugh as much as possible.

The first day I spent at home, he rewarded me with a new style babble talk - "Bahng! Mmm Bahng! Bahng!" - and rolled from his stomach to his back (leading with his huge head, which is kind of frightening).